Experiencing emotions is one of the most beautiful parts of being humans. Articulation of emotions is an essential part and undeniably an art. Emotional ventilation is an act of full and free expression of your emotions.
The major requirement of venting is to reduce stress. Venting just like any other communication process is a two-way process requiring the delivery of emotions from the person venting to the reception of the same to the person listening.
- Look For The Right Person To Vent To
The process of venting can lead to positive and negative outcomes, entirely depending upon the reaction of the listener: either through speech or action. In order to choose the right person to vent to, consider the confidentiality of the information that you need to get off your chest.
Choosing/Finding such a listener will not only include someone trustworthy but also someone who can understand your perspective, can support you, have empathy towards your burdensome feelings.
- Respect The Listener
You also need to respect the boundaries of the listener and make sure that your expression isn’t excessive for the listener. When you lend someone’s ear, you need to make sure that not too much negative energy is transmitted towards the listener. The thoughtfulness and empathy need to flow both ways between the person listening and the one venting.
- Do Not Exhaust The Listener
You need to ensure that the emotional reserves of the listener are not exhausted. Their steamed-up emotions can lead them to feel irritated, overwhelmed, or intimidated by the unexpected forcefulness of your words and even your tone.
Before making someone your sympathetic soundboard, make sure that you give them ample time to brace themselves for your emotional intensity.
- Confront Your Provocateur With Caution
If you want to vent out directly to the ones who caused you stress in the first place, then it needs to be done with great care and caution. Because whosoever caused you distress in the first place may not have the same amount of compassion to listen to you vent. Moreover, you still feeling incensed with that person might get in the way of you approaching the same person in an appropriate manner.
The tension in your relationship with the same may elude your chances of receiving understanding from the same person. After eliminating all the odds, if you are still willing to confront them, make sure that you’ve done every possible thing to calm yourself down in order to regain your emotional equilibrium.
It is important for you to take the perspective of that person and view the entire situation from their point of view too. A great amount of empathy for your antagonist will help you to develop validity for their feelings and thoughts.
- Remove Self-Bias
It is equally important to ensure that your self-righteousness has not led you to magnify the offense from what the other person said or did. Make sure that you did not impose on others, your self-biased criteria of what is the right behavior. Make sure you did not account for their behavior for something more harmful than they actually are. Make sure you are not forming opinions based on your ego.
- Write Down All Your Negative Emotions
In order to ensure that you are not being biased about your feelings towards your provocateur, you can also start by writing down all your thoughts and make sure that you get down all the venom brewing inside you on paper. It is one of the ways to ensure that you are less upset/angry.
Written ventilation will also ensure that you get to the roots of what triggered the feelings of distress in you. You can categorize your feelings as the ones of powerlessness, helplessness, worthlessness or not being loved or looked after.
Once you are done confronting your provocateur, ask yourself the next most important question; “Can You Let Go?”
Can you accept the fact that there are certain limitations inherited in your relationship with your provocateur, if the results are not in the way you would have preferred.